I think my recent wait for my medical procedure was helped by the waiting experience I had with Matteo.....waiting for something good is definitely better than waiting for something bad, but I'm trying to make sure that I make the waiting useful and relaxing. Some days, and some moments, are easier than others.
This weekend we had a visit from a Montreal family who is in the process of a third adoption. Matteo got along so well with the two little girls and we've been hoping to be able to travel together for their third, my second, so are praying. Was great to see them in person and finally connect, though again hard too because you want to be able to plan together! I guess even if we don't adopt together there is nothing stopping us from making our own plans...
....anyhow I'm almost finished updating all the documents they need. Hoping by the end of August those will be done and sent off and then if I have not heard anything by then, I wait some more.
......It has been great being on holidays with Matteo. The last time we were on an extended holiday break together was in summer of 2011 at the tail end of my parental leave. It is such an important time to just not have to be anywhere or do anything. So much of life is about schedules and time management and with children, that is hard to do and at times makes me feel so stressed. Mornings are usually very hard. It helps to be organized but sometimes being organized doesn't work and I need to be flexible. I think being flexible is necessary for the adoption process too....going with the flow of things is a skill and an art, both useful for parenting and for the adoption process too. I am sometimes good at going with the flow but at other times, it is so hard and I'm not as successful....so any messages about how to raise children and how to proceed often need to be tossed aside. Like teaching, I see how my confidence is growing as a mother. I have taken to mothering like a hand in a glove but I also continue to make lots of mistakes. Flexibility and forgiveness a good mantra to hold on to. Forgive myself and move on and try again. And of course I need to try to accept Matteo as he is and continue to try to understand what he needs from me. He is a loveable, smart, sensitive, and [stubborn] little boy who has a great sense of humour, already has ideas on his life and what he wants. At times he is so easy going but at other times a real challenge. So in addition to the forgiveness, there's also the other F word, Faith....Flexibility, Forgiveness and Faith....I like that!.....Faith is so important for absolutely everything in my life, to believe that there is a God watching over us who has guided my life and Matteo's life untill now and will continue to and to have faith that He will bring another child into our lives if that is what He wants for us, despite all the uncertainty around us....so yes, will try to remember those F words for sure!!
....In my next post I'll update with lots of vacation photos of Matteo and me from our first week off playing tourists and visiting local museums. We're not making too many plans just taking each day as it comes with a few thoughts on things to do, but if we don't feel like it, we don't. Matteo is so good about exploring and going out. He loves being out and about and never turns down my suggestions to go out. It is the only thing that can compete with his television watching and if he is given the choice of one or the other, he will always choose to go out.
{I sure hope that continues}
Ottawa is such a beautiful city and we live in a great community so close to so much. It is fun to be tourists and focus on relaxation while keeping the second adoption close to my heart, while loving and enjoying the gift of my first adoption, my son, Matteo Bao.
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| View of the Parliament buildings from the fountain at the Museum of Civilization in Gatineau |
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