Autumn Moon Parade.....

This year we made it to Samantha's annual autumn moon walk to the Ornamental arch in Chinatown.....but before we dropped in for some moon cake, we dropped by the Museum of Nature to visit with our adopted whale Wilbur. It was a beautiful night and except for the overtired little boy who had a screaming tantrum on the way home, it was a lovely evening. Thanks for organizing this and inviting us Samantha.

The Museum of Nature in the background with Wilbur in his glass atrium.

Just about to begin the walk.

As Matteo was already tired we took a shortcut from the group and waited for them to catchup on this lovely bench.

The colours of nightfall.

Checking out the real moon.

A new tradition, (at least for us) climbing the lion statue that guards the gate.

My little climber!

f

Some good news.....

I just heard from my agency and the good news is that the Ministry of Children has now re-confirmed (with the addendum to my home study) their approval for Adoption #2.

Breathing a sigh of relief here!!

"Wilbur is sad mommy."

Wilbur is the name we've given to the full-size plastic whale we've adopted at the Museum of Nature that hangs in the enclosed plexiglass space that resembles a pool.  You can see the enclosure in the building by clicking here.

Me:  Why is Wilbur sad?
Matteo:  He misses his mommy?
Me:  Like when you're at preschool and you miss your mommy?
Matteo:  Yes, we go see Wilbur again.

Matteo has always been very sensitive to animals, real ones, our cats, my sisters' and cousin's dogs, as well at the neighbourhood dogs we encounter.  He often pretends to be a cat or a dog. Matteo has also loved his stuffies and has many that encircle his bed.

Lately we have started to adopt fictional animals like this whale that Matteo kept talking about since we first saw it this summer on holidays. He always wants me to drive by it, stop, get out of the car and walk towards it. And when we're in the museum he has to go back to it numerous times. The last time we were there we named him.  If we can, we do drive by to check on him. Lately he's started to tell me why he wants to go and see Wilbur and the above conversation takes place.  When we drive by I always show him that Wilbur is fine. Matteo still has a hard time being dropped off at preschool. His transition from one toddler room to the next took almost a month before he wouldn't cry.   For preschool it seems to be taking longer also because of the changes they have been making. One being that the daycare centre used to have a kindergarten program but with full day kindergarten now available, they have transitioned into two preschool rooms. Matteo is in the senior group but through all these changes, Matteo is still having trouble.  He is so happy when I pick him up and doesn't want to leave, but mornings, especially Mondays, he still cries.  So I think with the whale he is working out his own issues of being away from his mommy like the whale is.

As of this weekend, we now also have 101 dalmations (imaginary ones of course) living with us. Matteo has been watching the movie for a few weeks and this weekend he started to tell me that the dogs were coming up to bed with him. I continued to play along and Matteo is thrilled and full of laughing when I try to get the puppies to get off his bed or when I try to make sure that everyone gets food to eat.  So not sure what Matteo is working out with the dalmations but I will continue to encourage him imaginary life in addition to his love and sensitivity to animals....then again we made need a bigger house if he continues to bring more and more animals to live with us!!

My singing boy....

"Me want a baby sister mommy"

Well holiday time is over and Matteo is now back at preschool. As the final few days of August unfold and as we approach the last long week of summer, I continue to be grateful for where we're at in our lives.

We loved being on holidays and not being pressured to do much. We had sleep ins and snuggles in bed watching tv and reading lots of books.  We had long walks and museum visits and playing tourist. We had playdates and visits with family and friends and shopping.  And we both had afternoon naps...how I loved those.

One of my favourite memories is of the first time Matteo said "me want a baby sister mommy."  Now of course a few of the television shows he likes have little sisters and no little brothers as in Caliou and Arthur...he does like D.W.; however, while I have spoken to him about a sibling over the last few months, this comment was unsolicited......I have asked him in the past if he wanted a baby sister or a baby brother and at first he said neither, then it was a brother etc.  So that was very sweet (and I was hoping it was another sign).

Nonetheless I really tried to enjoy this time especially because it "might" be the last summer holiday we have with just the two of us.

So on the adoption front, all paperwork and documents have been resubmitted to the Ministry and we are awaiting their response.  There shouldn't be a problem as everything is good; however, worry is par for the course through every piece of paperwork and every step in the adoption journey.  Other than that, no news and no new dragonfly spottings.

For now here are lots of photos to remember this summer.

Still loving his books.....

Waiting........ooooouuufffaaaaa!!!

Well second time around I thought it would be easier waiting but it isn't...it is and it isn't ......this time around while I know the process, though the process is always changing, and I know that dreams can come true, I have Matteo, it is still hard to wait with the unknowns, and the timing is just so out of your hands and out of your control. So you try to hang on to the little things and continue to make your plans though that is what is hard with all of this...as in you can't make too many plans though you still have to get on with your life!

I think my recent wait for my medical procedure was helped by the waiting experience I had with Matteo.....waiting for something good is definitely better than waiting for something bad, but I'm trying to make sure that I make the waiting useful and relaxing. Some days, and some moments, are easier than others.

This weekend we had a visit from a Montreal family who is in the process of a third adoption.  Matteo got along so well with the two little girls and we've been hoping to be able to travel together for their third, my second, so are praying.  Was great to see them in person and finally connect, though again hard too because you want to be able to plan together!  I guess even if we don't adopt together there is nothing stopping us from making our own plans...

....anyhow I'm almost finished updating all the documents they need. Hoping by the end of August those will be done and sent off and then if I have not heard anything by then, I wait some more.

......It has been great being on holidays with Matteo. The last time we were on an extended holiday break together was in summer of 2011 at the tail end of my parental leave.  It is such an important time to just not have to be anywhere or do anything.  So much of life is about schedules and time management and with children, that is hard to do and at times makes me feel so stressed. Mornings are usually very hard. It helps to be organized but sometimes being organized doesn't work and I need to be flexible.  I think being flexible is necessary for the adoption process too....going with the flow of things is a skill and an art, both useful for parenting and for the adoption process too.  I am sometimes good at going with the flow but at other times, it is so hard and I'm not as successful....so any messages about how to raise children and how to proceed often need to be tossed aside.  Like teaching, I see how my confidence is growing as a mother.  I have taken to mothering like a hand in a glove but I also continue to make lots of mistakes.  Flexibility and forgiveness a good mantra to hold on to.  Forgive myself and move on and try again. And of course I need to try to accept Matteo as he is and continue to try to understand what he needs from me.  He is a loveable, smart, sensitive, and [stubborn] little boy who has a great sense of humour, already has ideas on his life and what he wants.  At times he is so easy going but at other times a real challenge.  So in addition to the forgiveness, there's also the other F word, Faith....Flexibility, Forgiveness and Faith....I like that!.....Faith is so important for absolutely everything in my life, to believe that there is a God watching over us who has guided my life and Matteo's life untill now and will continue to and to have faith that He will bring another child into our lives if that is what He wants for  us, despite all the uncertainty around us....so yes, will try to remember those F words for sure!!

....In my next post I'll update with lots of vacation photos of Matteo and me from our first week off playing tourists and visiting local museums.  We're not making too many plans just taking each day as it comes with a few thoughts on things to do, but if we don't feel like it, we don't.  Matteo is so good about exploring and going out.  He loves being out and about and never turns down my suggestions to go out. It is the only thing that can compete with his television watching and if he is given the choice of one or the other, he will always choose to go out.

 {I sure hope that continues}

Ottawa is such a beautiful city and we live in a great community so close to so much.  It is fun to be tourists and focus on relaxation while keeping the second adoption close to my heart, while loving and enjoying the gift of my first adoption, my son, Matteo Bao.

View of the Parliament buildings from the fountain at the Museum of Civilization in Gatineau